I am turning 26 on Saturday, and I have to share something with you.
I have no idea what to do next.
A few days I woke up and completely panicked. What am I doing with my life? Should I paint my room pink? Should I take out a line of credit? Should I move out on my own? Should I buy a dog? Should I buy a goat? My day got pretty weird, pretty fast.
I thought I was just finally slipping into insanity but then I called my mom and she (bless her soul) identified for me that I am spiralling out because of my impending birthday. Since she is turning 39 for for the 16th time I felt a little silly being worried about turning 26. But being the wonderful woman that she is she told me that we all have our “numbers” that make us a bit uneasy. I guess for me that’s 26…and there’s a few reasons why. Twenty six is a weird age where you’re too old to not have responsibilities, but too young for society to let you have responsibilities (school until 30? cost of rent? lack of jobs?!). Twenty six doesn’t even have the benefit of seeming ‘glamourous’ like 25. At 26 you are officially into your late 20s (oh my god.) – barely, but you’re there.
Suddenly, I decided that the answer to any and all issues was to write everything down, make colour coordinated duotangs, and organize everything. In the last two days I started tracking pretty much anything that can be quantified. What I eat, when I eat, how many steps I take, my body measurements, my spending habits. I made a budget. I cleaned all 10 inches of my extremely small room. I started an online course on how to boost productivity. I made a personal life mission statement. I looked up how to start a book club (please, help me.)
Anyway. While journaling about my life goal’s (because, productivity course), I realized I don’t know what to do now. Surely 26 year olds can’t dress like early 20-somethings, right? All my dresses are too short. All my shorts are too tight. Seriously, what do 26 year-olds wear? Is there anything midway between ‘I just got into college’ and ‘I have a career and a dog’?
I also want to say that my days of eating pizza pockets every night should be over too. Which is a downright shame because I love pizza pockets. Probably I could still eat pizza pockets but I feel like my body is a bit less forgiving than it used to be. Also, do I have to start drinking red wine? I don’t really like red wine. But literally all of my friends who are 26 or older drink copious amounts of red wine. Is it no longer allowed to drink cocktails? Safe bet: water.
Okay, and what kind of makeup trends do wanna-be professional 26 year olds get in on? I’ve never really been a big makeup person, so I’m even more confused. As a wanna-be respectable 26 year old do I go more natural, or do I need a little extra help?
I don’t even want to know what’s going to happen to me when I turn 40.
You want to know what’s even more confusing? I’m a 26 year old student. What am I? Am I a student or an adult? How do you be both? I can’t justify getting done up to go to class, but I’m also super tired of t-shirts. Just kidding, I’ll never be tired of t-shirts…
By the way, I can fully recognize that this is 100% ridiculous. But I’m texting a friend who spontaneously moved to Australia while going to see a friend who just had a baby. I have no idea what I’m supposed to be doing!
If you have any comments, tips, advice, or otherwise quirky stories for me I’d love to read them below! If you need me, I’ll just be filing duotangs and sampling pink paint swatches while checking the internet out for goats in need of a home.